Struggling again
Every so often I get depressed. I have all my life, and Im taking a couple of drugs for it. But every little bit the thoughts of suicide still slip through the drugs.
Tonight is one of those nights. Don't worry, I'm not ACTUALLY suicidal...just thinking how great it would be if I had the nerve to actually do it. Sometimes, when Im feeling bad physically especially, I dream about complete relief and moving on to the next life.
Ive had enough therapy to know these feelings are transient. I know suicide is never a solution. But even in knowing, I still need some help along the way.
I go here:
http://www.metanoia.org/suicide/
If you are thinking of ending your pain via suicide please go to that link right now, you can come back here later.
It got me through again tonight. Sent me off on a research tangent, wondering what hotlines and stuff are available to me here in Canada. I also called my daughter and fired up my Yahoo messenger in case anyone happened to be on.
And the crisis passed.
Tonight is one of those nights. Don't worry, I'm not ACTUALLY suicidal...just thinking how great it would be if I had the nerve to actually do it. Sometimes, when Im feeling bad physically especially, I dream about complete relief and moving on to the next life.
Ive had enough therapy to know these feelings are transient. I know suicide is never a solution. But even in knowing, I still need some help along the way.
I go here:
http://www.metanoia.org/suicide/
If you are thinking of ending your pain via suicide please go to that link right now, you can come back here later.
It got me through again tonight. Sent me off on a research tangent, wondering what hotlines and stuff are available to me here in Canada. I also called my daughter and fired up my Yahoo messenger in case anyone happened to be on.
And the crisis passed.
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